It is a letter I’ve been writing for a long time, with repeating of the Fish Leong’s new album once and once again, after a thoughtful thinking in my long shower just now.

I’m writing in English not for showing off or something, just for escaping from irrelative people.

To whom it may concern,

Sorry, I betrayed your trust.

I’ve no idea how come I’ve been acting so crazily madly ridiculous. That was not me, not the real me. I guess my EQ must be damned low; otherwise I would not lose my mind. It just, just like when it comes to the problems about him, I cannot behave myself. When I faced him, everything on me is out of control. I was stuck in that atmosphere, could not think clearly, became irrational, and arbitrary…

I, sometimes, meant to do something awful, to make him disgust me. I thought if he treats me badly, I might would hate him and leave him alone… But my faults again, he’d never treat me poorly, neither would I never hate him. I got heartache when he’s still nice to me. I felt bad, felt guilty, and got less courage to admit my faults. I don’t know how and when I could confess to you. I’ve been struggling in it deadly...

Well, I know these are all excuses. I know the thing now is, I put you into such a great quandary, which I haven’t thought much about. I’m such an idiot. I was not an eligible friend. But I do treasure this friendship. I do appreciate your company during these tough days. I do, truly. Please, please don’t go away, please.

I don't expect your forgiveness, but just express my sorry and warn myself here. It’s time to get over him, totally. Thank you, so much.

Love,

eva